Growing up in a small town was truly an experience I wouldn’t dare regret in my lifetime. It taught me extremely valuable life lessons, I met a lot of beautiful, warm, and humble people. The air was pure and strong, the landscapes were one of a kind, the intense humid heat made water taste like heaven, and the food (especially from home) was better than any 5-star restaurant (I swear).
There was something special about growing up “en el campo”.
However, there were things that at the time (and even now) still can’t be compared to living in more dense cities. One of the most noticeable is that people around me never questioned why things were the way they are. And by never, I truly mean never. There were multiple occassions where I could ask or try to incite a conversation around the “why?” of things and that never got me farther than a few dismissing words away. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. People were happy, living a stable and fulfulling life, so asking “why?” was unnecessary. Everyone kept living, doing the same things over and over again, being satisfied with what they saw, had, thought, and did. Questioning that reality must’ve felt like being ungrateful with what God has provided.
But, at a certain point in time, I started noticing people were too satisfied. Perhaps too much, more than they were supposed to.
My friends went to the same bars every weekend. My parents rarely did something outside of their comfort zone. All conversations were centered around things that happen in the present. My teachers only taught what was on paper. Everyone studied the same things people usually study: administration, architecture, medicine. Everyone also went to the same university, dressed the same way, and said the same things (as if that was a requirement to attend.)
I am not gonna be dishonest with you: I also did these things, and I was happy I was part of the group, “one of them” in a way. Everyone seemed happy to be themselves, so I thought, “I should be happy too!“. Turns out, that didn’t work for me… well, it did, but not for long.
Know more
I remember that in 2008 Twitter was mentioned in a Facebook group I was part of and was being distinctively discussed as a boring platform (no images, just text), so most people didn’t bother to try it out. But I did. There was something attractive about being able to speak my mind freely where no one else knew who I was. Over time, I met other people from other countries (Mexico, Venezuela, Colombia, etc) with very interesting topics of conversation. The experience of these conversations was exciting. I can only remember the sensation now, but it felt like I was finally able to talk about things beyond my day-to-day: the future, who we were (in a deeper, meaningful sense), evolution, religion (but not just the part where we try to convince each other to change churches), space, and a bunch of other interesting things! I was so excited that I spent every night talking, debating, sharing ideas, and fighting over ideas. It was fun.
That experience on Twitter told me that I didn’t want to just be “one of them”. I wanted more. I wanted to know more, to meet more people, to study something different, to discuss ideas, to change, to become something more. I wanted to question the reason things are the way we are.
Why?
The Why, for me, is a pattern of perceiving your surroundings and finding meaning in everything that exists there. To find meaning, questions are needed. Imagine you see an unknown creature on the floor. Some questions that may arise are: “What is that?”, “How is it moving?”, “Is it alive?”, “Why is it here?” just to name a few. Most people will stop at the first question, I go all the way to the why, and that information allows me to understand better the unknown creature; I can sympathize with its existence, and may even empathize with it by trying to understand it.
A common example I like to think about is insects. Most people are either scared of them, or simply do not care at all; in both cases people kill them. But, have you ever stopped to think about the reason why those little animals exist? Why are they there? If they would do anything to a human? The most common conclusion will be that they are not what you thought they were, and are pretty important to the ecosystem!
So, understanding why insects are what they are, can allow you to understand their importance and make your Being aware of the existence and utility of these living creatures. It is a trivial example, of course, and may not reflect the full picture, but it is a starting point from where you can expand and start questioning things on your own.
Rarely, not so often
People don’t ask why. But that’s not really what I focus my attention on — it’s what they say when other people ask why. The most human thing is to fight for survival, and that comes in all shapes and formats, including fighting against change. It’s natural, like an instinct. If things are OK, why bother asking? Let that thing be, and on your way you are. Let nature decide what’s best and if it needs changing, change will come.
I find myself in a lot of situations where I start asking questions (not just the why, but primarily), and in almost every instance of that interaction my peers’ immediate reaction is to defend the status quo and fight against the idea of a new possibility of change. It’s OK, I say to myself, it’s normal. But the reality is that I wished people thought of questions in more curious manner, before rejecting the new stream of thoughts that are being discussed upfront. We love to find reasons why things should not change, or questioned, or challenged. But, aren’t we missing something? Innovation has to start somewhere. Change is painful but the reward is worth betting on.
We should be discussing, more often, why things are the way they are.